EstellaI had a girl once,before she died.she was pale and thinand sunken-eyedwith thin white lipsand raven hairand anger hiddenin her amber stare.She came to mewhen I was alonewith heartache riddled,mind of stoneshe played to meher desperate songsand kept me aliveall winter long.And through it all,though she tore at me,there was nowhere elseI hoped to be...She was an orphanof wide-open spaceschild of bookshelvesmy empty placesI granted her solacehere in my heartalthough life had begunto wrench it apartShe played to my torment,self-created anguishthe parts of my bodybeginning to languishand I kept her there safein my haze of regretthe sole consolationI could hope to getAnd she kept me alive,but she kept me asleep,down under the raftersmy sorrow so deep.And still over time,I began to rebelI began to see real lifenot as living hellbut she sulked in my cornersstared storm clouds at me"We're worthless," she said,"And it's all we will be.
ZenSometimesIn the zen gardenRocks contemplate people
Broken momentsSitting beside the windowTwisting a strand of hairThinking of those broken momentsWhich no magic can repairIt seems like just nowYou whispered something about loveIt took me to up to the skyAmong singing and dancing dovesOh how can I forgetThat smile, that blushWhich only and only your voice could bringNo matter I was in what rushBut then fate came inTore me from withinSmashed and thrashed the dying meAnd left no way for light to come inI should have knownHappiness isn’t for meI never get what I long forNo matter how much I pleaSo now I have to move onOr at least I would tryBecause this world never bears a weaklingJust leaves it to die.
fearthere are those who fear death,there are those who fear life,but fear neither of those,and you can feel alive...
Ugly Masks.You painted an ugly mask,on that pretty face of yours.Was there a purpose?What are you hiding from? Who?You swapped out honesty,for bold face lies covered in booze.You took away the laughter,for self inflicted pain,Keeping others away,no one can hurt you, right?You threw away your pride, dignity, and morals,just to save yourself.Took away your own free will,and left yourself in the middle of the night,no one can hurt you, right?Pretend you don't care,turn in your real emotions foranother mental scar.Change the bright colors,to dull shades of gray.Paint on that ugly smile,just to make everyone else go away.no one can hurt you, right?When you constantly hurt yourself,you don't give anyone a chance,to hurt you.So go ahead and paint that ugly mask,on that beautiful face of yours,but you aren't fooling anyone.You're just going to hurt yourself.